Hari ini dalam sejarah

Mengantuk.

Terasa macam nak cakap dengan diri sendiri. Dah lama tak bercakap dengan diri sendiri. To me, talking to myself is like self-meditation. Very comforting & relaxing.
My working life is stagnant now. Few weeks ago I learned how to handle ESOS (Employee Share Option Scheme) when my Manager was on leave. Once harga saham naik, mula bosses menganggu hidup. Bosses macam takde kerja, setiap hari tengok harga saham Kencana naik ke turun. Haihh.

Last year, several of selected staff were given shares, and proud to say, I am one of them. I was given 15,000 shares to practice this year with affordable practice price. Sekarang harga saham Kencana macam sudah naik, tapi aku tak cukup duit nak beli.

I wish I'm a billionaire. Macam-macam benda nak beli, banyak tempat nak pergi lagi.
Nak jadi bos. Terasa malas kerja tak payah datang kerja.
Boring duduk rumah, pergi shopping atau travel. Kalau boring lagi, baru pergi kerja sibuk-sibuk kat office. Best kan...

Harini tak best.

Pagi-pagi baru keluar daripada kawasan rumah, tengok kiri kanan, kiri takde kereta, kanan ada kereta tapi terasa sempat keluar simpang. Tapi rupanya kereta tu laju, terpaksa break terkejut. Terus terasa hari ni tak best. Sampai office, kerja semua dah siap, takda kerja pending pun, office pun tak busy. Buka website MAS, tengok harga tiket pergi New York. Return flight RM26,800. Mahal nak mam... terus rasa tak best.

Malam ni, Adeline asked me to join her play futsal at OU. Dah bersemangat bawak baju & kasut skali kene pospone lewat kul 10mlm...hmmm. still thinking nak join ke tak...On the way to office pagi tadi, tengok traffic light lama-lama, rupanya ada bintik-bintik kecik yang sangat geli....euwwwww...terus tak tengok traffic light. Tak sedar dah greenlight, kene plak horn dengan orang belakang..haihh..semua tak kena harini. haihhhh...

I'm back!

whew..finally back to the office :)
Melbourne was GREAT. very COLD!
travel report later, got to do some work!

I'll be away for 2 weeks.
Yay! i can't wait for that. Been very busy at the office lately. It was so hard to take care of all the bosses. They caused me headache :)
I'm going off tomorrow. YEAH!! Finally :)
I have settled everything. Need to go to EPF and do the payment for company afterwards. And...need to go to clinic after work for anti-influenza injection.
Noen and Yoyo asked me to join them for dinner tonight. But I haven't do packing yet....hmmmmm...okay got to go! da!!

Fear Factor

I'm just an ordinary jane that afraid of height, pain and dark. But to overcome it, I always tell myself, “fuck!! I can face it!!” and I will usually try to handle it.
For instance, when I was little, I’m afraid of dark. To me, to be in a dark room / place is unsafe because on that time I believed that ghosts are every where. It takes time for me to force myself to look around when I walk alone in a dark. Now, if I pass by a big tree or an abandoned house, I will take a look at it like waiting for the ghost to come out. After that I am not afraid of dark-anymore because it just a feeling that we create to scare ourselves.

The same goes with pain. I did lots of piercing to overcome the fear of pain. The biggest fear was when Sonno, a friend from Yogya came to KL. That was the first time I feel it by myself and thought, needle is cruel. Someday, I want to try bungee jumping to overcome the fear of height. I wanted to dive into the dark ocean and find out what’s in there actually. I want to do sky diving as well.

As a conclusion, I WILL TRY EVERYTING TO OVERCOME FEAR.

BUT NOT FOR THIS ONE!! I will die if I see tiny holes / round image placed side by side. I can’t stand it!! I’ve tried but I just CAN’T! I HATE MYSELF FOR THAT!!! I hate acupuncture stones at the park (yeah, I’m weird, so what??) and I HATE the breast picture that I’ve found when I was blog hopping yesterday. If you are brave enough, please click http://z.about.com/d/urbanlegends/1/0/5/D/breast_larvae_sm.jpg
SH*TTTTTTTTT!!! ARGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

I’m using this image as my PC wallpaper now. There are still A LOT of countries that I need to stopover. Next target would be Sabah (probably end of this year-still trying to persuade several friends to take scuba diving license with me!) and Thailand (hopefully in Jan). Now I just want to focus on this month’s trip. Hmm, can’t wait for next week :) the 2 weeks leave has been approved last month and I hope it’s all worth it. I haven’t do visa yet, hopefully I could settle everything by today. Hell yes, I want to try bungee jumping (if I have enough cash and if I have guts) and HELL YES, I want to watch ‘AGAINST ME’ acoustic show. I CAN”T WAIT for the excitement but I don’t want to get over excited!!

don't belong, don't exist, don't give a shit, don't ever judge me! (hehehe..my fav.quote since 1998)

This guy is one hell of magnificent person I’ve ever known.

He is outspoken, independent, helpful, brilliant, bold, but sometimes can be very timid. He enjoys spending his free time at Borders and he loves food. He eats almost everything! When he gets his payment, he will buy a lot of books for himself and he’ll bring me to the best restaurant/stall/hawker. We love to try different kind of food. Sometimes I cook for him. His favorite is my assam pedas fish (that’s what he said).

Other than that, he spends most of his time working. I should admit that he is a workaholic guy. Don’t ever talk to him when he’s doing his work, he will totally ignore you. His Macbook is like his second girlfriend (perhaps, no 1 gf??), he’ll cart it everywhere he goes without fail. As a designer he always don’t have time for himself, but I can see that he tries so hard to spend his time with me, his friends and mum.

He treats me as a partner. We figure things out together, we discuss about things together, he is free to do whatever he likes and so do I. Both of us never belong to each other. We are belonging to ourselves and we are free to do whatever we love to. Only trust and integrity in relationship are matters. Argumentative between me and him makes us awake and it helps to improve ourselves to a better person.

I could say that he is my best friend, my partner and my rival as well.

introvert or extrovert??

Love the conversation that we had with Cem on last weekend. The conversation took place at Jalan Alor after we sweat like pig at Bad Omen gig at Noisy ampang. (how many 'at' laa)

The conversation started with:
Are you INTROVERT or EXTROVERT?

hahah, that words remind me of my University days..so lame but interesting, anyway.

I think I am introvert. I only can be extrovert to introvert people. If someone ask me to crash other people's party, I will end up socializing with people that Im familiar with. I HATE myself for that!! At the workplace, I am quite extrovert. I dont have problem to socialize at all. I'm confuse with myself. If i hang out with new people, it takes time for me to fit it. I notice, I am not a type of person who take the first move to ask somebody's name or to start the conversation (THAT MEANS I AM INTROVERT TO STRANGERS). I wish I could change that. I wish I have guts to make new friends everytime i go to party/event.

Oh yeah, we thought about print a statement t-shirt for ourselves, but with different statement.
I was thinking.....this statement for myself:

"I AM INTROVERT & i love rock n roll"
and i would wear that shirt to party/event, so that extrovert friend will come near me and ask my name.haha. And yeah! we were thinking to organize party for INTROVERTS only.hmmmm cant wait for that!

Haha, on Sunday Yoyo came to my house and we had our 'jamming kapok' session. So, we came up with new song! The song is called 'INTROVERT WHORE'...aahhh cant wait to record itttt :))